Raising An Introverted Child: What My Mum Did Right

I know a lot of introverts have parents who doesn't understand their more introverted nature. They have traumatic stories about being forced into situations that overstimulated them, exhausted them, and made them miserable with social anxiety. I don’t have stories like this. Now, don’t get me wrong, I have my fair share of 'I have to do alot of house chores' stories and all. But growing up, I never felt forced into situations I didn’t want be in for the sake of behaving “normal.”

What my Mum did Right:

SHE NEVER FORCED ME TO “GET OUT MORE” OR BE A PART OF A GROUP IF I DIDN’T WANT TO BE I know so many extroverted parents who see a regular, active social life as a mark of a “normal” teenager. If their introverted children weren’t social enough, they would pressure them to get out more. My mom never did this. She knew I had friends, and while I saw them outside school from time to time, I was always free to spend my weekends reading a book or watching TV. SHE NEVER FORCED ME TO GO FOR A SOCIAL EVENT A lot of parents would have pushed the issue, believing these experiences are important. My mom never did. I was sometimes encouraged to attend once-in-a-lifetime events like camps and school programmes. SHE SAW WHAT I WAS ACTUALLY INTERESTED IN, AND FOUND BOOKS, CLASSES, OR RELATED ACTIVITIES AND GAVE ME THE OPTION TO GO.

While there was plenty of “normal” activities I wanted no parts of, my mom was able to find me the stuff I did like and found ways for me to explore those interests more deeply. It didn’t matter if it was something she was familiar with or not. She saw what I gravitated towards and found a way encourage it. And because she respected the environments I liked, she was able to put me in situations to explore what I loved without getting drained or overwhelmed.

SHE SAW WHEN I NEEDED EXTRA TIME/SUPPORT Part of being an introvert and means that too much sensory stimulation or change can be seriously overwhelming. My mom was always able to see when I was overwhelmed and out of sorts and found a way to give me extra time to adjust or extra support to navigate the situation. This has helped me process change, thrive in it, and even learn to look forward to it. SHE HELPED ME EASE INTO NEW ENVIRONMENTS For a lot of introverts, especially highly sensitive ones, new environments can be very overwhelming. And if you’re having a new experience in that new environment, it’s overwhelming One way my mom helped with this is by making sure I was introduced to the new environment before it was time for the experience. Whenever I resume a new school, She was always there to put me through... When I first resumed in the University she was there to put me through everything which made it easier to make friends. ....... However, every child requires a different style of parenting, but the parent need to understand the child's personality to know which style to adopt. If an extroverted child is raised this way, Such child will feel the parent is interfering in his/her personal life and not giving him/her a chance to grow up.